a bigbig thankyou :D

ANNA
CONSTANCE
GOHJIAYI
HUIYUAN
HAIWEI
ERJIE
ZHENGYANG
JUNYI

for my super belated bday pressie xD
(my bday : 25nov, btw. xD )

love it alot alot! i dont dare to open leh. scared will spoil.
._.
i used to have a musical box when i was really little too.
and i love it alot,
so i kept opening and closing it,
&then one day it spoiled.
D:

anw, i will treasure this de! (:

**

unspoken thoughts,
unfound secrets ;

perhaps ignorance truly is bliss,

**

i was pretty high for today,
mainly cus things are finally looking up for me. (:

history lesson went by,
had to say,
although i was hungry,
im starting to get tired of the western food sold in the canteen.
o.o

hahaha, bought spaghetti anw.

cid was madness,
i think i went up and down many many times, just to get my eom done.
(erm, paper for printer? constance's, anna's, liangshixian's, and my little secret. xD)
and im damn lucky to be such a blur person and still not lose my uniform. left it on a bench in the canteen. heng nobody took it. ._.

chinese? hah, free period, more like. :D
went high, really high. laughed like shit.

physics, ohwells.
i completed my physics assignment early this time and was told to copy down the correct answers. was pretty much discouraged cus i put in quite alot of effort and it wasn't marked.
sighs-

break again. i actually ate second helping. gosh-
zhengyang : what's wrong with jennie man?
haiwei and me ate and ate, and we still feel hungry btw. hahaha.

english~
lols, free period again. sorta.
i attacked chiziwei's phone. got many many many songs can?
wah sai. i dont know why my dumb memory card now no space for the songs le._.
madness.

ahwells,
:D tata :D

swing swing ;
6:20 PM;

we asked for a wish,
but all we've got to do,
is just to believe.

**

pretty late now._.
i wonder what im doing still up and not on bed snoring away like a pig.
wait, i dont snore. xD

**

with your blessings,
i know,
im better off than i was ytd.

swing swing ;
12:31 AM;

have creativity?
use it well,

lack it?
be yourself!

**

i just realise im not a very good arts student,
science, perhaps (that's a very big perhaps there.)
but nonetheless,
yes im better at science than arts.

geog? i can say i have not much interest in it.
hist? it's too unstable for my liking. (i only like it when i get good grades. which is completely not what a hist student should think like.)
i mean, i like the skills and all,
but maybe when i cant grasp concepts of psychology (basically that's the thing i like about hist la, it's how people think and react to certain situations. like war, duh.)
i get all zzz.
besides, the grades are demoralising.
music? yay! love it. at least, the appeal for the ear. go further than that, when it comes to the theory part? the value of notes, the way every individual notes are played? comeon, i suck at rhythm. everyone knows that.
art? hah. try asking me to draw a stick figure. look at my stick figure and see if you want me to do art. (i seriously doubt so.)
elit clit? hmm, i like e lit, alot. but being the PRAGMATIC person i am, i think it's pretty useless. c lit? i fail my chinese. get that into your brain, and try asking me if i like c lit again.
econs? i dont know what's it like. lols.

sighs- perhaps i just aint creative la.
i cant twist, i cant bend,

i can only do everything very si3 ban3.
i like being in ruts,
i like routines,
i like fixed everything.

but it doesn't mean i dont appreciate the arts okay? :D
in fact, i can appreciate almost everything.
selective appreciation then. :D

**

"i must be born as a genius, everyone around me seems to be a retard in someway or another."

**

silence-

swing swing ;
6:05 PM;

blow my insecurities away,

**

firstly,
credits to chiziwei for sending me breathless!
and junyi for sending me pictures of you!
heh and jiayi for.. hmm, nvm. long story. :D

BREATHLESS BY SHAYNE WARD!
believe me, it rocks. (err, not exactly a new song, but nonetheless niceee! :D)

if our love was a fairy tale
i would charge in and rescue you
on a yacht baby we would sail
to an island where we’d say I do

and if we had babies they would look like you
it’d be so beautiful if that came true
you don’t even know how very special you are

CHORUS
you leave me breathless
you’re everything good in my life
you leave me breathless
i still can’t believe that you’re mine
you just walked out of one of my dreams
so beautiful you’re leaving me
breathless

and if our love was a story book
we would meet on the very first page
the last chapter would be about
how im thankful for the life we’ve made

and if we had babies they would have your eyes
i would fall deeper watching you give life
you don’t even know how very special you are

CHORUS

you must have been sent from heaven to earth to change me
you’re like an angel
the thing that I feel is stronger than love believe me
you’re something special
i only hope that i’ll one day deserve what you’ve given me
but all I can do is try
every day of my life

CHORUS x2

**

(:

btw, haiwei &i rock!
hahaha, we wrote the same example for our essay today.
cool right! :DDD

**

vibes ><
hahaha, i shall get used to them, tune them out,

&focus on what's important. (:

jiayou me!

**

hmm gohjiayi called the three cats she found biggie, smallie, and middlelie.
hahaha, &she's obsessed, i swear.

anw, updates on our class's noob points are very unstable.
everyone's noob points are constantly increasing.
im amused :D

speaking of amusing, huili amuses me :D
she can talk and make me laugh, VERY EASILY.

(:
pretty damn fine today eh? my mood, i mean.
im not exactly high though.
but im not low. (:

yupps,
till then,
tata!

swing swing ;
6:25 PM;

caught breathless.

**

firstly i would like to curse my stupid fellow asl, sebby.
*cursecurse*
first time he pissed me off, but im sure i will get over it soon. hahaha.
after all, it's sebby.
he's dumb, but he's sebby.
i shall forgive him. (im nice, that's why.)

i want his darling EFLAT, soon. :D
and he better not lock the instru case with that dumb key again,
i will EAT that key, really, i mean it.
><

as you can see, im obsessed with that little cute instru that just dont go well with sebby, quoted by some bandsmen :D

*hugs eflat instru case*
(no i dont have the case with me now, im just thinking of hugging it.)

**

kinda exasperated over the consequences of my irresponsible behaviour in the past.
lols.

one thing i hate most is bad timing though.

LOL. when i mean bad, i mean real bad.

**

i found out im not that afraid of lactic acid anym! :D

**

ohyes im very tired,
"blinked a little too much" during chinese lesson.
totally banging my head against the surface of the table hardly isn't any unusual sign for everyone, but it is a little to me.

remember the first time i sleep during lessons,
that was in sec3!
lols, chinese lesson too.

i guess chinese really doesn't appeal to me.
where's lijie laoshi? she was my inspiration,

not to say luo laoshi is bad la, she's great too. quite encouraging.

but sometimes she really turns the engine in me off.

im sorry.
cant help it.

**

*bangs head on table surface*
sighs- it's gna be another blink-y day for me :/

swing swing ;
9:50 PM;

i get vibes,
and i trust what i think is happening.

what im afraid of,
is what i have to ignore from now on,

if everytime i start being paranoid,
i am affected in terms of performance,

then i am a failure.

&duh, i dont wna be a failure.

not gna let anything influence me anym, yeah?

**

anw,
i find my progress in terms of appetite rather pleasing.

i might be able to grow taller/fatter after all!

pleased-

**

run- with your soul,
reach- for your goal.

i believe i can do it.
I BELIEVE. :D

swing swing ;
7:17 PM;

ate sushi today. hahaha, hmm, raw eh?
"IM RAW!"
xD

taking pictures is quite fun ahaha,
i wonder if i should take up photography just for fun in the future.
if i have time that is.

anw,
this pouch from myuk is funny.
"hand over the chocolates aand nobody gets hurt"
im glad i have a pouch now, at least i wont be called a big bag sort of girl so often anym xD

like denim material stuff le,
this new shorts i have super nice. definitely on my fav clothes list. :D

sighs-
yeah i definitely cant blog naturally these days. everything i type is..
too organised in a way.
i dont type freely.

ahwells,
i feel sorry for whoever's in that car.
erm, curse the rain or wind that made a tree fall right on balestier road and a frigging car with people inside obviously?
hope they are okay.
yet another reason to hate the rain eh?
especially when im in a state of having not much self esteem.

hey, self esteem is important yknw.
i feel like im ugly all of a sudden,
like i dont have what i should have,
like im really far from being a perfect person or smth,
not like i achieve to be perfect. imperfection can be nice too.

but still,
im too frigging ugly.
i realised im too frigging skinny,
(thanks to english lesson hahaha,
thank goodness im not obese though.
but those supermodels really disgusts me in a way, yknw.)

ahwells, eat more,
"open" my appetite?
and have i mentioned? eat more.

YUPPS.
eats-
eating's good for you,
unless you're obese.
or you're those ignorant people who think eating macdonalds for every meal every day is alright,
if so,
either you're damn ignorant,
or you're just disgustingly acting ignorant.

if you die,
you deserve to.
hey, dont take offense, but yeah. i have the right to think otherwise from you right?

lols.
what's up with me?
i guess it's this headache gnawing at me at the back of my head.

sian,
tatas.

swing swing ;
8:10 PM;

so,
from this moment i believe.
(:

**

lols, yeah so im like, finally blogging again. xD

highlights :
being sianded for the whole day by the pile of hmwk and the very tiny want to finish them
scs
band camp
freaking out over the obviously still mostly untouched hmwk, which looks like a mountain, really.
doing hmwk

._.

as you can see, my holidays were neither enjoyable or productive.

**

scs,
left after a short while from schl (band camp day 1)
was having sectionals (blue sky march) and i left lols,
so went to find huiyuan,
turned out that she was nowhere to be found, till i heard the trumpets and trombones hahaha,
well, there was a gate to where trombones are having their sectionals, and i went there, stunned, then went down the stairs, stunned again when the gate there was also closed, and walked one big fat round just to get huiyuan.
apparently she found it funny too. xD
"HUIYUAN! FASTER! THEY CALL ME ALR!"
hahaha. i still cant believe i walked one big round and was still able to "freak out" and say that.
no scratch that.
SCREAM that.

was raining, we ran. nice running in the rain : D

met up with the rest.

reached scs.
"mood changing in progress : zzz"
i swore, i was high. saw er-hem, and i went really really low.
lols,

AHWELLS i had to take two lil kids that day, the other lil kid was samuel!
this super dao boy at first who ate his sandwich and drank from his cup facing everywhere but me.
then he started warming up to me le :D
i guess i was pretty lame that day. couldn't make the kids laugh alot.
WELL THAT EXPLAINS MY MOOD.
ohoh, &i got this really nice feeling that aishah is starting to be SCARED of me! HAHAHA,
operation pencilbox-confiscating, success!
muahaha, evil, yes. but you've got to fight evil with evil yeah?

went to orchard lols, was getting pissed with all the crowded kiasu people who went there to shop at the BIG isetan sale.
lol,

went home, :D

band camp day2 and3
well, i remember the drills in the morn. :D (nono, i LIKE drills.)
combines, saw mschan get pissed at the attendance. (sighs-)
(we played doraemon though! cute :D &we played jupiter too. ROCKS!)
lunch? (: saw jiayi and went screaming at her. well, erm, highlights : she was speaking to two cats in agony.
"we mean you guys no harm!"
i ran away from her. hey, that act of insanity might spread to me yknw. (heh, xD)
hahaha i also remember this super rock drills competition!
our group has 6people. lols,
i have to say we did pretty well! i like the erm, maju? command.
heh, abit comical, :D
ohoh, i got nervous heh, screwed up abit ><
ohwell, at least i have to say i improve for drills. no more horsekick (:
crazy circuit was, well, crazy.
for my turn, i ran one round with the flag. i wished i had the energy like i did that day with alvina, with pure adrenaline and nthg else.
anw, fell down straight away after the run, leg was really weak.
started to cramp later. was terrible.
(wenhwee helped me get rid of it. :])
had dinner,
well. gosh- siwei ate 4packets of beehoon i swear.
then we had games. hahaha kimberly rocked at human puzzle. 1minute plus. i dare you to break our RITARDED score! :]
obstacle course, we din do too well. haha, me and kimberly unfortunately dont have much muo4 qi4. poor evan, he had to ren3 my impulsiveness. ><
cans stack. our plan rocked. steal everything first. xD then the other group couldn't find their cans. (were they the one who walked in circles?)
ohmygosh- funniest. i din participate much though, too confusing le.
bomb defusal. (stop aiming your camera at me, lols!) another nice game. dropped three balls though. hahah.

sleep time. gosh- couldn't sleep.
if camping at schl means having to stare at the scariest darkness ever, and having to sleep in a freezer,
i can tell you, i detest camps. xD
but thank goodness i shared sleeping bag with sofia and zoenin. used sofia's as a blanket. the two ends (one of them is me) tugged at the sleeping bag sometimes ><
heh,
was a mess when i woke up.

morning exercise was ._.
hahaha, ran a few rounds, (cramp almost came back heh.)
but running in the morn is good. :D
breakfast. MILO CRAZE! :D

ahwells. home. at last.

anw, freaked out over hmwk. like i said.
sighs-

swing swing ;
7:51 PM;

i need you boo, xD

with you by chris brown,
not bad :D

**

&chiaki chiaki chiaki is back on my huachi list!
he's super the damn shuai can? (koped jiayi's usual line.)
ah chiaki <333

btw, those who dont know chiaki, go watch nodame cantabile.
anime or live, up to you. heard both was nice, but i watched the live one only.

ohohoh ;D chiaki loves! <3

**

and poof my milo craze is backkk ;D
suddenly craving for milo, so had a cup.
boy, i love milo. how i love love love milo.

*whispered comments : ohman, jennie has gone bonkers. again.*

lol, that was just some random comment from inside my head,
ignores. :D

**

jiayi went hysterics tgt with me
when we talked bout the day i took my ss test tgt with cons and huiyuan.
fellow bandsmen in 4i (:
super rocks, cus i was surprisingly the most sane person in these three.
CONS AND HUIYUAN WAVED LIKE MAD TO JIAYI ON TIPTOE AND WAS EVEN JUMPING ABOUT TO ATTRACT JIAYI'S ATTENTION!
the prob is, jiayi din see it la,
ohgosh. imagine the scene, it was hysterical xD
i love it when we start fooling around (:
these days felt like a period of prolonged tension, and i dont like it D:

saw wenhui and chaiying at novena square just now,
was quite stunned,
and there were 3 other people heh,
recognised one as a yuhua senior,
&then the other two i din see clearly :/
ahwells! anw, here's what i messaged the two SMORE super lovely seniors i miss alotalot
(why wasn't gim with them? :/)
smth along the lines of : hey i bet you two are eating at long john at novena square now. if im right, call me smart. BIGgrins-

i have this inflatable ego in case you din notice.
so when i want to go damn ego, i can : D

**

had a lovely day today anw,
though i was quite restless.
still, it's the hols,

if there were people i trust that i will work if i go on study dates with them,
i will.
actually, there are such people out there.
heh, see how lo. actually i dont trust myself sometimes leh xD

zhiyi's too busy these days too :/
she's my super bestest partner for study dates,
and my stead too (:
(i confirmed that earlier today, after the two timing her and liang xD )

speaking of shixians,
i miss my bro alot :/
those mrt rides tgt.
sighs-
but we get to see each other every band prac though :D
but i guess both of us are too busy nowadays to really sit down and chat ba.

ahwells, back to my milo :D
MILO MILO MILO!

(p.s. chiaki rocks ;D )

swing swing ;
9:13 PM;

hope your wounds recover as quick as possible,

cus to speak the truth,
you are one of the few people whose cheerfulness i really admire.

it would be sad not to hear you laugh,
not to see you smile,

although you probably wont see this,
but i would still like to say,
no matter what happens,
we would be here for you.

**

im starting to wonder whether my life is more like a cube,
or a sphere.

the practical side of everything,
increasingly evident nowadays,
that,
resembling a cube, with corners so distinct,
it's impossible to have true strength to have your way,

the never ending space of time,
the many dilemmas you have to face,
the many uncertain choices you have to make,
the risks,
that,
resembling a sphere,
which just goes round and round,
simple, but profound.

i guess the future has in store for us a solid hard cruel fate,
&in place of a heart with emotions,
is an unbreakable stone,

and no impact, however big,
could break it.

how i wish that was true.

swing swing ;
9:42 PM;

so this is it.
the chio-est present ever.
zhengyang's bday present.
im so jealous can? ><

(din even get presents from 4i last year. jiayi and cons will give me soon xD hahaha super belated. thanks guys! :D )

ya la, you see, so chio lo.
hahaha damn nice,

**

so it was another day at schl.

highlights:
learnt calculus for math,
decided i might consider potassium iodide as one of my subjects. wonder if i can take the rigour though.

I LIKE CALCULUS!
(whatever it's spelled as. i dont care spelling sia, i care bout the content. eh! infinity leh! dont you find it interesting?)

erm, but i've got this terrible feeling that it will soon transform into smth i hate. cus it's pretty hard to understand the content, and it has got alot to do with physics. it's hard la, basically.
i hope i can do well for this topic lo.

**

got totally high and tried different kinds of laughter. i can switch from this laughter to that really easily now.
zhiyi and limjiayi are especially stunned by my ability of switching from seal laughter to triplets laughter to hyena laughter and finally yijun laughter aka witch laughter.
how dare that yijun say my laughter is weird when he laughs like a witch himself! xD

**

figured i can actually run pretty fast if i push myself.
long distance.
sometimes i just give up yknw, and slow down.

same applies.
i've got the ability,
im not dumb.
so why not?

swing swing ;
9:03 PM;

you are my fire,
the one desire (:

**

i like playing all the songs in my comp,
randomise them,
then play.
although i know most of them,

older songs also appeal to me,

ahah,

**

&the bags, the shoes,
all that a girl wants,

i wna think maturely from now on,

most of the time,
we say adults talk crap all the time,

well, think again,
is that true? or just a statement due to peer pressure,
or perhaps, due to a moment of selfishness and lack of thinking.

deep inside, some of us dont believe in the "fact" that adults talk cock,
at least, not all the time.

being practical,
all of us will grow up like that, no doubt.

we would work till our death,
we would become human beings who take money as their priority,
and happiness often returns to us only during the last decade of our lives.

admit it,
we are just being insensitive and selfish. deep inside, at least i know im a lucky person to have what i have.

&i should appreciate it as much as i can.

thanks mom,
i have you to thank for, mostly.

**

wish bugs will stop bugging me,
yknw, they keep flying everywhere, and it's kinda getting irritating.

**

the anticipation,
the worry,

listen for the sounds of silence,
the moments of truth,

i so wna sustain it,
so very badly.

**

&i dream weird these few days.
seem so real,
but ridiculous!
the faces of people around me popping out in either this dream or that,

tsk. HAHAHA, i wont reveal my dreams though,
i always appear retarded in them.

**

&so, i shall leave a memory of reds and greens,
and walk down the path,
to see you at the very end,
smiling proudly at me.

swing swing ;
9:52 PM;