that's what you get when you let your heart win;

**

song recommendation :
that's what you get
- paramore, riot

why do we like to hurt so much?(:

swing swing ;
7:32 PM;

since junyi wants me to post semakau pics,
i will do so. :D
lols, btw, some pics might irk you because they have me, who's ugly D:
ugly me D:
in no particular order!


so that's one of the ugly ones. as in, me. we intended to be spastic, &jiayi looked alright. me? HAH, i look like i belong to a freak show._.


so we'll fly to the ends of the earth! :]


here's our dear form, jiayi, haiwei and cons (:


that's a pretty freaking big lizard if you'd ask me o.o


so here's a pic of the wind turbine or smth that provides the energy for 12 lampposts :D


very nice view right? err, haha, i have a nicer view. but cannot rotate D: so we'll stick with this.


the sea, the blue blue sea (:


the puddles that alvina wanted to jump into ._.


mimosa?


guess who's behind the tree? the girl who said she was meant to be hidden LOL!


yupps, it's alvina! haha this pic rocks ^^


4i bandsmen unite! (:


yes, ignore these two gays from our class. they are nice gays though, one has big ego, the other is a big joker ._.


ohno! candid shot! what are we doing? xD


that's better.. yay! :D


haiwei! :DDD


the very spastic corn who's constantly chasing me for pta forms LOL


that's us again! yay! :D


cheese! :] (i love this woman, she's my fellow zihigher &moodswinger!)


yes i know im short, a certain someone do not have to highlight that fact. ._.
btw, serming looks funny, as always. xD


zhengyang! super nice guy. stupid wind. LOL. (no link)


JUNYIs of 4i ._. (my chinese name is jun4 yi2, y'see.)


huiyuan, loves :D she's that super nice friend who helps me when im in distress!


not to forget erjie the bestest tablemate ever! loves her to bits and pieces :DDD


constance bestest buddy ever to support you when you fall. she's fierce at times, yet demure at others! o.o
love her too :DDD

jiayi! we should have taken a "formal" pic tgt! anw, i love you too ^^

that's it man. i know there are alot of other pics but it's currently not with me ba.. D:
4i rocks man, i know we're supposed to go to this field trip to learn stuffs, but i think we all ended up having a deeper and better bond.
4i <3

(:

swing swing ;
7:39 PM;

just taught my bro a math question.
p2 math, number patterns.

they give you a few numbers that forms a pattern and asks you to write down a missing number, that kinda stuff.

anw there were two questions, i taught him one and asked him to do the other one.

he wrote down the correct answer straight away, and i asked him how he did it.

he couldn't answer me. like whatthehell?
he refused to talk.

somehow it reminds me of desmondlim's lessons.
how he wants us to say everything that's going on in our minds and not just shut up.

i got mad at the fact that
kids at my bro's age were so used to getting answers that they had no need to think so deeply.
in the end, they cant even think when they come to secondary schools.

no wonder the gap.

my mom thinks im mad btw. getting mad over it.

im just stating facts.
if the fact is that students will be tortured because of the difference in education systems of pschl and secschl,
i rather train my bro hard so that he wont have that much of a problem later on.

sometimes i think im mad too. thinking too much sia.

but im just getting troubled over how things work la.
it's like stress is constantly attacking me.

swing swing ;
5:58 PM;

black eyeliner can bring out your eyes,
but too much makes you look like you just smeared blank ink all over your face.

**

went to semakau landfill ytd,
thought it was gna be another crap typical field trip.
highly uninteresting, cant learn anything much.. stuff like that.

turned out to be better than i expected. i like it there (:

anw took super loads of pics,
brought my cam along, which was running out of batt from the very beginning,
i forgot to recharge it ._.

but it din let me down, i took quite alot of pics before it was pushed to its limit.
ahaha, i love my cam <3

pics will be uploaded when i feel like it.
i look fugly in them, that's why the possibility that i wont post them is pretty high.

anw it was really fun if you asked me.
some kind of stress relief experience.

**

well, talk about stress relief.
there just happened to be spongebob mania on teevee.
nickelodeon if im not wrong.
keeps showing spongebob ._.

watched it while i was having dinner,
&seriously, has anyone really realised how spastic that yellow sponge can be?
it's like,
HE'S DRAWED TO BE STUPID ON TEEVEE!
he exists to be stupid.
he exists to provide entertainment for us (:
i love spongebob.
LOL.

stomach hurts loads.
maybe i took in too much liquid.
downed packets and packets of different drinks.
lols, brought it upon myself.

**

hanging on tight
to my roller coaster ride,

it's gna end soon,
in the blink of an eye.

so watch out,
for the sudden thrill alright?

swing swing ;
8:14 PM;

curse headaches that jump on you when you least expect it.
._.

**

(the below is a mere translation of a story i cant help recalling every now and then.
i cant seem to forget the plot, it's a nice book indeed.
(:
forgot the book title though. LOL.)

yes we could have been the best of friends.
but sorry, im not gna keep my part of the promise,
i've got much more to do,
i've got to move on.

perhaps those friendships were mere illusions,

call them real?
comeon,
i dont even feel sincerity.

**

i slept for quite long today!
it's hardly any use, just wasted a couple of hours being a pig, that's all.
since the headaches are still there.

but ohwells, im just happy i got my sleep.
YAY! :D

swing swing ;
10:24 PM;

swing swing ;
9:01 PM;

basically,
i feel numb.

im close to freezing point.

especially when things are running past all of us at this pace.

so when you stop and stare at whatever's been going on,

you numb yourself.

maybe that's why all of us feels stressed one way or another.

**

im having my doubts.
if i have more than enough on my plate,
why should i continue with it.
my appetite isn't that big. both literally and abstractly.

**

slow down, and think. i need to release myself.

swing swing ;
5:49 PM;

deformed puzzle piece ;
once it doesn't fit anym, you know it's time to let go.

**

today was a terrible day.
snooze-
i went to schl later than i expected, yes, freaking bus service *curse*
saw huili on 51. hahaha, she watched the news on the bus. smth about us's and singapore's leaders.
saw haiwei run with beishan for 2.4km, and i only can join in at the last round. ): sorry beishan.
anw, goodluck to you, if you see this anw. (:
ran one more round with haiwei after that,

lessons after lessons,
i cant help but feel distracted.
like mrchoy said, some of us were very detached from the lessons,
i guess i was a little at first. mainly because my eyelids are starting to feel heavy,
and mainly because what he's doing on the board, i understand.

pe was terrible.
we ran two rounds (actually, i walked abit, with different people, ran abit, and stuff like that.)
after that was soccer. 4i match. boys vs girls.
yes, like they said, it was practically a defence match for the boys, and fun peace laughter and joy for the girls.
constance was damn amused, by alot of stuff, one of which was how the girls at the goalpost literally RAN AWAY from the ball and yet the ball didn't go in.
she rolled on the floor, really.
i was basically sitting there amused as well, but not rolling on the floor, and watched how the boys control the ball's direction. they do it really well, you cant steal the ball away from them that easily.

i ate today. like, really ate. yay for me?
recess was malay food, lunch was spaghetti, on the way to scs was mamee? (HAHAHA.)
i totally influenced anna btw, she swears she will buy mamee._.

wants info for scs? today's 10apr, go to our blog and look at my reflection.
double terrible._.
http://scs-cid.blogspot.com

swing swing ;
8:27 PM;

given this situation :
jennie does her homework.

work done will be zero,
because there is no displacement involved.

the potential energy is wasted, eh?
lols._.

**

oh god.
he thought quite well of me last year.

so i guess im gna try to earn back the trust that i gained last year,
and prove him wrong for this year.
that is to say, im gna try to do his work, and really focus on every single detail in class?
(forgive me for morning lessons. i tend to stare into space after a while.)

**

it's time to do my cid blog posts xD
i kinda suck as a blog organiser eh?
since im putting up checklists and everything to monitor the progress of everyone blogging their visits,
and i aint doing the posts myself ._.

sorry :/ heh,

swing swing ;
7:44 PM;

well i never saw it coming,
i should've started running,
a long long time ago,

- over you, chris daughtry

**

a story of dreams and hope,
a story of truths untold,

**

restlessness took over,

**

silence now,

**

tata. xD

swing swing ;
11:39 AM;

slaughter sunrise,
&a broken heart.
**

everything's about technique.
get the technique right to achieve! :D

lol,

i shall say nthg about the two tests i took today,
simply cus i have no reason to talk about it until the day i get back the results.
after all, it's the results that count.
no use telling yourself, "ohno! i got this wrong! shit._."

pretty much did smth for the first time today,
and that was to sleep only a few hours for that day.
hey, im a pig, can be a pig, and will always be a pig.
unless you count chalets,
i NEVER EVER slept less that 6hours before.

anw, slept for 4hours.
from about 1230 to 430?

anw, i've got loads to say on napfa! :D
(i got a silver, can you believe it? i cant._.)

first station was sit and reach,
demoralising that it is, i actually failed.
gosh-, one more mark to pass.
and i've never worried bout sit and reach before,
it's always the jump that scares me.
(but the tchr said she will let me try again after i finish everything :D)

second was shuttle run,
wheeeeeee, i found out im actually not bad at it!
so much for my short distance run theory. lols,
first : 11.8?
second : 11.1?
heh, anw, got an A there :D

third was inclined pull up.
lols, since A was above 16,
and i havent really practised much these days,
i din expect myself to do exceptionally well,
until i reached 16,
and do one more last one to a 17.
an A here too :D

forth, sit ups!
god, i think i really hate situps alot.
i cant do them properly without someone holding on to my feet zzz,
maximum is 3 situps, and im dead._.
but anw, erjie helped me loads! hahaha it's good that she's my partner, cus she really pushed down on my feet, and that helped me alot. i think it's easier when you have a firm grip on the foot.
anw, one more situp to an A.
got a B here ._.

fifth and last, my most feared station._.
jumped a few 150, alot of 160, one 170, and a few more 160 ytd at home.
was really jumping for joy (lols.)
so naturally i started hoping i can do more. like 170 constantly?
yeah, at least that way im on my way to getting a gold.
but,
first : 158
second : 148?
._.
149's the passing grade.
158's a D.
bye gold ._.

went to sit and reach again.
(thanks erjie! xD)
but i think i stretched alot, kept reaching for my toes while standing up and bending down,
can touch the floor too :D
so this time i got a 44 xD
29 to 44, stunned xD

i heard junyi helped some of the girls do the same too.
hahaha, everyone's sit and reach suddenly damn zai.
jiayi din accept his "help" xD
anw, a B for sit and reach :D

i must say im most proud of my 2.4km.
:D
i told you im not scared of lactic acid anym :D
14.05, an A :D

now that napfa's over,
i wish we can still run regularly,
as in 6rounds.
i wna see what my best timing is.
and if i can maintain a certain speed.

**

chance to redeem?
yes i definitely made the best out of these chances.

i better not start falling again.

swing swing ;
8:22 PM;

lols, sick sia. ._.

the 2.4km run was okay for me though. :D
i guess running frequently (cus of band) really does help.

**

morally wrong.
totally.

**

today was a pretty bad day.
woke up with my fringe to a side of my forehead anw,
and i hecked and din comb back the fringe.
so my fringe remained like that lo.

it's side parting now, not center parting. (:
lols, tmr im back to center parting though.

badbad day.
im a lil off today.
probably aftereffects of being too high ytd.
now im low,
real low.

anw, enough bitching here.
im starting to feel the climax of the aftereffect,

probably will be better a few days later.

swing swing ;
3:34 PM;