“What is the most resilient parasite? Bacteria? A virus? An intestinal worm? An idea. Resilient… highly contagious. Once an idea has taken hold of the brain it’s almost impossible to eradicate. An idea that is fully formed – fully understood – that sticks; right in there somewhere.” - Dom Cobb

I think I rather like Oscar Wilde's quotes, too.

Quotes, quotes, quotes.

I wish my fear would go away. Compounded, completely irrational fear. Because insanity had once been sane, after all. And it shouldn't happen, wouldn't happen, because we were calm, nonchalant, stoic, unmoving, but it just kept going,
carving,
bleeding..
Death goes against every human instinct, because we are built to be able to live,
but death is so easy.

I wanna be faster, stronger, better.
I wanna take on the challenge of being one of the fittest.

swing swing ;
5:01 PM;

Stress level's going down pretty smoothly, I'm glad for that.
But I'd like it even more if I have time to do stuff that I enjoy.
Stuff like, running, writing, painting, taking pictures.

Homework is fun, it really is. I just don't think my mind is settled down enough to not be stubborn about it.
It's like I've set my mind to do other stuff.
I just want to see a shadow of the old me, the freak who actually thinks homework is fun. It is supposed to be, anyway. Because if it isn't, then you will never get any satisfaction from doing it, and what's worth working for in life if you don't derive anything from it?

Stupid rigid illogical brain of mine. ):
Mild OCD, a bit abnormal.

Lol, I think my stress works in very weird ways.
It either makes me behave crazily, or it makes me display physical symptoms like dry heaving and stuff. Uncomfortable. I prefer the former, because that one I can do something about. Something I can control.

I fear, btw. I fear many things.
I fear strange people, I fear sharp objects, I fear water, I fear balls, I fear swallowing, I fear fearing.

I think it's all curable though. Minor stuff. I'm a normal girl who thinks too much.

Currently I think some people really deserve their places in my heart.

Family comes first, of course.

Jiayi Goh knows too much of me to not be considered a best friend, and besides, there's always something that ties us back together whenever we face the danger of separation. Don't worry if I still don't trust anyone, you're very quickly getting rid of my doubts of lifelong friendship. And I'd be willing to bet you're going to be the first exception, out of those very few that would make the list.

Chan Songhua, I don't have the time for him due to A's, but he's still there for me urging me on and giving me comfort and support in every way he can. You have no idea how grateful I am. Thanks, really. And never hesitate to approach me when you need help, I'll be there in every way I can.

Various classmates/ex-bandmates that are suffering like me and cheers me on anyway. If and when I make it through, I'd make it my mission to make each and every one of you smile for as long as you people know me.

And of course, there are some others, but Jennie's a lazy girl, so..

.. To be continued.

swing swing ;
9:30 PM;

swing swing ;
11:07 PM;

Misery Business by Paramore. High school is evil.

And stress beats it hands down.

I refuse, I refuse, I refuse!

swing swing ;
11:38 PM;

Just realised a few days back that my blog skin is made based on the song Swing Swing by All American Rejects.

Was listening to my mp4 and the song was playing, and the lyrics struck me as very, very, very familiar.

Heh, I'm such an unobservant little creep.

**

Rubs eyes. Guess everyday's gonna be a horrible day.

swing swing ;
4:00 PM;

"Here's the new art of the twenty-first century: the art of curating, the art of plucking all the good stuff from a superabundance of crap... Why should you view something that's not great?"
— Joseph Gordon-Levitt

**

Saved as drafts.

Hmm, ignorance is bliss. I could write an essay on that.

swing swing ;
10:50 PM;

Has to start inflating. Am infuriated at this state.

The same blasted music's been playing downstairs every single blasted day.
It's no wonder I don't like Poker Face anymore.

Unhealthy fixation on Joe.

I need to eat, sleep, and move more. Sluggish behaviour is horrible, shows bad omen.

Kovan Residences is (Y).
Too bad it's not freehold.

I'm thinking about money again, hmm.
Needs to earn many many money. And learn how to manage my finances, because obviously I screw up even the money/time allocations in games like Sims. Not that I play much of such games, I'm not a gamer.
So, games screw up, real life confirm also screw up right?
Ahaha, can't find another person like me.
Fixated on $$, but no chemistry with $$.

Every Monday will kena kicked out of class during break time. Fine with me ar.
Needs to return those 3 blasted books to the schl lib, what was I thinking borrowing them?

(Y).

swing swing ;
10:30 PM;